"Once we clearly acknowledge the soul, we can learn to hear it's cries. - Dallas Willard, Renovation Of The Heart."

It takes courage to pursue our dreams. It takes time and patience to unearth buried treasure. But I believe with all my heart that we must do both.

8.21.2010

beginnings

Making the room warm and homey



Color definitely helps


new friends



 She seemed excited about the next chapter in her life. So leaving her was easier than I expected. Greg and I arrived home around midnight last night.

  I woke up at 7:30.  I came downstairs and Meg's door was closed. 
I opened it and noticed how empty it seemed. A lot of her stuff is still here, but it felt empty.
I am having moments throughout the day of tearing up.  As I think about it, it's more than just her not being here, because she was out and about much of the time while she was at home. I think more than anything I am feeling some remorse at not doing things with her while I had the time to. Of letting precious moments fly by and not being more purposeful. I am not going to stay there, I know that is not productive.
And I know though our relationship will change, it does not have to be less, it can be more.
On a different level.

I'm trying not to text her every hour.  Actually I emailed her this morning and left it at that. 

For those of you who have children still at home, it goes by so very fast.  Make the most of every moment. 

Blessings and hugs!


22 comments:

Joji said...

Oh how I know your pain. Left mine at college last summer. Cried all the way home and for weeks after....One semester later he was back home for good. =0
He decided to go to school right here at home..Now for some reason I had angst about that too. But it has all worked out. Life is what happens while making plans for the furture.

PaperPumpkin said...

I understand just how you feel, Mary. My son will be back to school again in a couple days-his senior year at the university! When he packs up again this week, I will again feel that horrible emptiness. His room will make me cry. And when I remember his freshman year (yesterday it seems) I felt the same way. I still can not believe how quickly our children grow up.

Lisa said...

Blessings and hugs to you Mary : ) Time does move fast! We always leave Zacks door open when he is away at school.

Hugs
Lisa D.

Just Be Real said...

Awwwww dear one.... ((((Mary))))

Megan Hoover said...

i have tears...i know it's what i should do and i find myself feeling guilty when i'm feeling like i just want 5 minutes' peace from all of them. thank you for the forecast --it will help me to be more mindful. now i just need a heaping dose of energy to enjoy them to the fullest -- they do wear me out! :) Smiles lady-- smiles and a margarita!

Jennifer Richardson said...

I so get that.
Her room is lovely....bright with hugs from home whenever she needs one.
Trusting the Father with and for you
...for those missed opportunities to be restored
in the most amazingly creative ways and grace
to drink that cup dry.
For all of us.
Hugs,
Jennifer

Bev said...

don't be too hard on yourself mary...just be in the moment and rejoice for the independent beautiful daughter you have...you did something right, that's for sure! my guess is after everyone gets settled, you will be enjoying it! and your time back together for visits will be even sweeter...
the girls room is adorable, and i love how they hung the window curtain over the pipe, how creative is that??!!!
thinking of you...
xo

Ophelia said...

Thank you so much for the very precious reminder.

Nancy said...

Oh Mar, my sweet friend....I feel so for you. I remember what it was like and leaving makes the heart hurt especially for that last one....
My daughter's oldest is going to Kindergarden and she is feeling some of the same feelings..Even as grandmother I am sad because I dan't go and get him when I want to...where has the time gone...I told her to brace herself that a Mom's heart hurts frequently but give them wings and they will fly...just as Meg is doing.....she looked so happy and their room is so cute.....You've prepared her well; take joy in that.....

I will continue to pray for you and Meg and the adjustment is as easy as possible....

Hugs and blessings to my sweet pal

Martha Lever said...

What a precious little dorm room! Meg looks so happy and quite adorable! I know this is a hard time for you but each day it gets better. And actually you and Meg will be closer than ever. And it is SO much fun to live vicariously through them. You will have a ball hearing about her new life. Really you will!!

Erin Butson said...

Such a great reminder when all I want is a minute to myself. "Momma play drum? Momma cook? Momma color?" Such an exciting time for you + your daughter. Can't wait to hear your stories.

Sandra Hall said...

Hi Mary
I understand the ache you feel just now...three times over...but as you so wisely state, your relationship becomes (will become) so much MORE. Andy and I were amazed/proud, even bemused at how different our children were each time they came home from University. They were forging their own way in this big old world we live in, that was scary sometimes, mostly with our youngest daughter, who got hurt/taken advantage of by 'friends' during her first year...but her faith in God and the way we had brought her up helped her through.
So just to say, even though there is an ache just now, there will be joy to come...
x x

Buffy said...

Awww Mary Big Hugs to you again! Thank you for the reminder that time does go by quickly. I know this and I think thats why I try to spend so much time with my last one at home. I have two older ones and I felt the same way,Did I spend enough time with them? I still ask myself the same question with Niki. I think all mom's do. But you're right you can't keep going back and thinking about that. And on a postive note,Meg looks happy. I love the color in her room.

Emeila said...

hugs and smiles to you. Have a blessed day. When we drove my sister to her school, I felt empty as well. She lived 8 hours away.

Her and I are very close. I know how you feel. It passed for me then I had many great memories of us and treasured the time when she would come home or on the phone.

Jane Farr said...

Meg's made a cute little nest for herself, and I wish her a wonderful freshman experience! As a mom facing an empty nest for the first time myself, I think it is a bittersweet time and one for reflection - But that's not necessarily a bad thing. :)

LeeAnn@Encouragement Is Contagious said...

Oh Mar, Meg's decorated collage room looks beautiful! She is colorful just like her momma! Love it! Our daughter's of course have their own personalities, but in them they take a big part of their mothers with them in what they do and who they are. I know down the road you are going to hear a lot of "thank you mom" as she takes over new things in her life on her new journey. I'll never forget my daughter calling home to thank me for teaching her how to do THE LAUNDRY while she was at home! ha She told me that I wouldn't believe how many there at college, many didn't have the faintest idea how to do it at all. Just that comment alone meant the world to me. Those little things that have made her a big part of who she is will be what she thanks you for. And even if she doesn't say it out loud, you will see it and be proud that she has a big part of YOU inside of her.

You did a wonderful job Mar! She looks so happy. I'm here for you and I do understand the bitter-sweetness of this time and transition.

Many many big warm hugs!
♥Lee Ann

Jo Reimer said...

I remember that first time I left my daughter at school and drove home without her, then looking into her room which was still full of her things and feeling the emptiness and the regret over wasted time. It's been 24 years now and we're all doing fine. She'll pack her eldest off to college in 4 short years and it'll be her turn to feel like her arms are empty and her duty is almost done.
God bless you all.

Denise said...

Her room looks great, prayers continue for you both.

Connie Lou said...

I just wrote a post about my son in the military...my heart is holding hands with yours...God Bless..big time!

Lindsay - Paint Me A Picture said...

Thanks for the reminder. I am guilty of having said, "I can't wait until my kids are in college"...and the are under 2! I know it was exhaustion induced and sarcastic, but you know. Hoping for a smooth transition to the new chapters for both of you.

Bevie said...

You must remember my sweet sister you and Greg have raised a delightful, loving,caring,inteligent, your woman so she has lots of confidence within herself...AND she love our ABBA Father which makes things even better...I will pray that she adjusted beautifully...I need her email so I can keep in touch too..ehehhe!!! Am anxious to come visit...love you!!!

Janette@Janette's Sage said...

Oh so know this feeling...four are launched and two more to go and I am holding so strongly to those two...no, I am trying not to so they can still grow, but cherishing every moment.
Now I am starting to look forward to grandkids!!! Each season has it's joys!!!
Blessings on the adjustment!!!