It has been pouring since yesterday afternoon. I am sitting on my screened porch, comfy, safe, from the storm outside. And safe from the storm inside. I am in a sweet spot right now. Life is not perfect, I am far far far from perfect, but I am content, resting in what God is doing in my heart. He is showing me I am not where I once was, and I am not where I will be when His work in me is complete.
Here is what He has been saying to me through the process of the paintings I spoke of in the previous post. I read it again and these phrases jumped out at me.
changed over time - He has and is changing me
finished appearance - I am not what I will be
self-taught - does not work - I need His guidance
lack of skill and knowledge - it's His skill and knowledge
be yourself - without all my many masks
layers, both pretty and ugly - there is much more work to be done - that's okay
make me who I am - He is molding me into the person I was created to be be
no longer fit - I cannot go back - I do not fit who I once was
It is so nice to rest in HIS hands!!
May you all have a blessed day,
Mary
8.31.2009
8.27.2009
Layers - Part 1
Good morning blog chickies, well, to the roosters too, but most of you are chickies!! :)
The paintings I posted yesterday started out being something far different than their finished appearance. Painting is still new to me, and since I am self taught I lack the skills and knowledge to get my hands to do what my mind wants to paint. Crap, sometimes I don't even have a picture in my mind, just a feeling. Sometimes it's a picture of another artists style that I want to produce.
Tuesday, I labored all day, and I hated the painting when I stopped out of pure frustration. You know it is time to stop when you hear your own advice coming from your 17yr. old daughters mouth. "Mom, take a break, walk away, come back to it later." Okay wise daughter of mine, I will. lol During the night I developed a horrible migraine, but in the pain I heard these thoughts. Why are you trying to be someone else?? Look at what you seem to paint repeatedly. Look at your very first painting. Stay with this for awhile. Okay! So the next morning after I downed two extra strength Excedrin, and slept for two hours in Megan's bed (I had been chatting with her while she finished getting ready for school) I got up and began to paint. The first one I completed was the green cross. It was finished fairly quickly. I realized it would have never looked the way it does without all the layers underneath, some were pretty, some were downright ugly!! Now, this was the second painting for my husbands office. The first one I posted a few posts back. It no longer "fit" since they were to hang together. So I grabbed it and I'm telling you in 5 minutes I had the outline of the cross. Different enough from the other one, but one that would compliment it as well.
I have learned several lessons from these. Since this is getting to be a rather long post I'll stop here. I need to ponder my lessons a little longer anyway. Ask my Abba what he is saying to me.
Thanks for the prayers for my headache. It was mostly gone by bedtime. I have a small one this morning, and that hangover feeling from the massive migraine (if you have them you know what I mean) Gonna do wash and catching up stuff today. No obsessive, frantic painting today.
Blessings!
The paintings I posted yesterday started out being something far different than their finished appearance. Painting is still new to me, and since I am self taught I lack the skills and knowledge to get my hands to do what my mind wants to paint. Crap, sometimes I don't even have a picture in my mind, just a feeling. Sometimes it's a picture of another artists style that I want to produce.
Tuesday, I labored all day, and I hated the painting when I stopped out of pure frustration. You know it is time to stop when you hear your own advice coming from your 17yr. old daughters mouth. "Mom, take a break, walk away, come back to it later." Okay wise daughter of mine, I will. lol During the night I developed a horrible migraine, but in the pain I heard these thoughts. Why are you trying to be someone else?? Look at what you seem to paint repeatedly. Look at your very first painting. Stay with this for awhile. Okay! So the next morning after I downed two extra strength Excedrin, and slept for two hours in Megan's bed (I had been chatting with her while she finished getting ready for school) I got up and began to paint. The first one I completed was the green cross. It was finished fairly quickly. I realized it would have never looked the way it does without all the layers underneath, some were pretty, some were downright ugly!! Now, this was the second painting for my husbands office. The first one I posted a few posts back. It no longer "fit" since they were to hang together. So I grabbed it and I'm telling you in 5 minutes I had the outline of the cross. Different enough from the other one, but one that would compliment it as well.
I have learned several lessons from these. Since this is getting to be a rather long post I'll stop here. I need to ponder my lessons a little longer anyway. Ask my Abba what he is saying to me.
Thanks for the prayers for my headache. It was mostly gone by bedtime. I have a small one this morning, and that hangover feeling from the massive migraine (if you have them you know what I mean) Gonna do wash and catching up stuff today. No obsessive, frantic painting today.
Blessings!
8.26.2009
Two paintings
These paintings began so different than they are now. I want to share a little about them with you all, but I have such a migraine that I cannot put my words together very well right now. So the story of how they came about will have to wait. I am very pleased with how they turned out.
Blessings!
8.21.2009
What is my good?
As I was thinking about my last post I had a few questions.
Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose."
The Message version says it this way.
"That's why we can be sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good."
Work together for good, worked into something good.
What is our good? Not what we think is our good, but what does God think, What does God say is our good?
God says our ultimate good is "to be conformed to the image of his Son" The Message says, "He (God) decided from the outset to shape the lives of those who love him along the same lines as the life of his son."
So my ultimate good is to become like Jesus. So when hard things, come into my life, whether caused by my own foolishness, someone else s foolishness, or just by living in this world,
God will use that to mold me. It is not necessarily to make my life easier, or even happy, which is what we might think is "good" - but to make me more like Jesus.
Loves unconditionally, is compassionate, merciful, wise, selfless, these are qualities of Jesus. Do I want these - oh yes! Do I want what it will take to mold me, change me from the sometimes unloving, selfish, harsh, flawed, woman that I am? Sometimes yes, sometimes no! God knows me inside and out. He knows my struggles, my heart, my flaws. He loves me unconditionally as I am. But wants more for me. He wants the best for me. The best is Him!
Blessings!
Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose."
The Message version says it this way.
"That's why we can be sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good."
Work together for good, worked into something good.
What is our good? Not what we think is our good, but what does God think, What does God say is our good?
God says our ultimate good is "to be conformed to the image of his Son" The Message says, "He (God) decided from the outset to shape the lives of those who love him along the same lines as the life of his son."
So my ultimate good is to become like Jesus. So when hard things, come into my life, whether caused by my own foolishness, someone else s foolishness, or just by living in this world,
God will use that to mold me. It is not necessarily to make my life easier, or even happy, which is what we might think is "good" - but to make me more like Jesus.
Loves unconditionally, is compassionate, merciful, wise, selfless, these are qualities of Jesus. Do I want these - oh yes! Do I want what it will take to mold me, change me from the sometimes unloving, selfish, harsh, flawed, woman that I am? Sometimes yes, sometimes no! God knows me inside and out. He knows my struggles, my heart, my flaws. He loves me unconditionally as I am. But wants more for me. He wants the best for me. The best is Him!
Blessings!
8.17.2009
From Above
"You would have no power over me if it were not given to you from above."
(John 19:11)
I know God is good. I know God can take a hard, a bad thing in my life and use it for my good.
He does not make the thing itself good, but he does cause good to come out of it. It might not seem like that in the middle of it. It might take years for me to see the "good" that came from the hardship, but I have come to trust just enough to know it to be so.
Sometimes it is a hard thing to accept, there is so much hurt, hardship, even evil in the world. It is not an easy thing to grasp - why does God, when he could in an instant change things, allow so much agony to happen?? I think that is something that will be questioned while there is life on this earth. It is a good question to ask. It will be a question asked until we know God enough to know he loves us with a passion, he is out father, he yearns for a relationship with us, he truly desires the best for us. Until we know his heart toward us is good all the time.
Some might say it is easy for me to say that, some might say you have a home, you have food and water, you have......... Yes, that is true, and I ask myself would I be able to say God is good and for me if my circumstances were different? I don't know, I would like to say yes, because I trust his heart. But..... I do know it is possible. I have witnessed it. I have seen and heard those in horrible circumstances still trust. I think because HE IS TRUSTWORTHY!!
I read this a few days ago, it caused me to stop and think on this again. Helped me to once again think through what I believed. I do not believe God "causes" evil. He cannot. He is good, not just does good, HE IS GOOD. Just like he does not just love, HE IS LOVE. I do believe he allows evil because he allows free will. I believe he allows the hard things to happen, but that he can and does take those hard things - again he does not make those things necessarily good, but causes good to come from them. (just a note here, I think that if we are not actively communicating with God during the hard things, asking for eyes to see, asking the questions, staying close to him we can become bitter and hard when life is tough. We need to keep open, mold-able hearts and minds)
"Isn't it glorious to know that no matter how unjust something may be, even when it seems to have come from Satan himself, by the time it reaches us it is God's will for us and will ultimately work to our good?" (Streams in the Desert)
Because God knows ahead of time what will happen, he see down the road, around every turn we make. He begins working for our good even before it happens.
"You would have no power over me if it were not given to you from above"
May you all know and experience God's abundant love and grace.
(John 19:11)
I know God is good. I know God can take a hard, a bad thing in my life and use it for my good.
He does not make the thing itself good, but he does cause good to come out of it. It might not seem like that in the middle of it. It might take years for me to see the "good" that came from the hardship, but I have come to trust just enough to know it to be so.
Sometimes it is a hard thing to accept, there is so much hurt, hardship, even evil in the world. It is not an easy thing to grasp - why does God, when he could in an instant change things, allow so much agony to happen?? I think that is something that will be questioned while there is life on this earth. It is a good question to ask. It will be a question asked until we know God enough to know he loves us with a passion, he is out father, he yearns for a relationship with us, he truly desires the best for us. Until we know his heart toward us is good all the time.
Some might say it is easy for me to say that, some might say you have a home, you have food and water, you have......... Yes, that is true, and I ask myself would I be able to say God is good and for me if my circumstances were different? I don't know, I would like to say yes, because I trust his heart. But..... I do know it is possible. I have witnessed it. I have seen and heard those in horrible circumstances still trust. I think because HE IS TRUSTWORTHY!!
I read this a few days ago, it caused me to stop and think on this again. Helped me to once again think through what I believed. I do not believe God "causes" evil. He cannot. He is good, not just does good, HE IS GOOD. Just like he does not just love, HE IS LOVE. I do believe he allows evil because he allows free will. I believe he allows the hard things to happen, but that he can and does take those hard things - again he does not make those things necessarily good, but causes good to come from them. (just a note here, I think that if we are not actively communicating with God during the hard things, asking for eyes to see, asking the questions, staying close to him we can become bitter and hard when life is tough. We need to keep open, mold-able hearts and minds)
"Isn't it glorious to know that no matter how unjust something may be, even when it seems to have come from Satan himself, by the time it reaches us it is God's will for us and will ultimately work to our good?" (Streams in the Desert)
Because God knows ahead of time what will happen, he see down the road, around every turn we make. He begins working for our good even before it happens.
"You would have no power over me if it were not given to you from above"
May you all know and experience God's abundant love and grace.
8.16.2009
Saturday Fun
Saturday I got to meet two sweet blogging friends!! Can you tell by the above picture who one of them was?? :) I have a few of her paintings, but this is my first of her altered dolls!! Yes, I finally got to meet Suzan Buckner - Thrifty Collage Artist, and Katelen Tays - A Poetic Artist, at the Slotin Folk Fest in Norcross, Georgia.Blogging has become such a blessing for me, I love the bonds that are formed between us online. But it is even more wonderful to meet in person, to be able to see the ones that we communicate with on a regular basis. I would have posted a picture of them, but they both hate having their pictures taken!! One day we just might have to dare them to post a picture of themselves on their blogs!! They are both beautiful women!! Yes you are!!!
Suzan and Katelen, I am so glad we got to meet. Suzan thank you for my gift, it was very sweet of you. I have been walking around my home trying to find the perfect spot for it.
I really hope to meet more of you in the future, but for now please know what a treasure you all are to me.
Blessings!
8.12.2009
Painting for my husband's office
I think I really like doing abstracts. Me thinks I need much practice though!!
8.11.2009
Freedom
"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery". (Galatians 5:1)"Christ has set us free to live a free life. So take your stand! Never again let anyone put a harness of slavery on you". (the message)
I like this verse. Partly because it says I am free. I really like that because I hate rules!!!
But it is not saying that I am free to do any ole thing I please. It does say I do not have to live by what others think a Christian should do or not do. I do not have to be a people please-er. Only a God please-er. On the one hand that is easy, on the other hand it is hard. In my own strength I tend to do what my flesh, my old nature wants to do. But there is a strength in me, not my own that enables me to live the life God has called me to live. The tricky part is learning to exercise that strength. Learning to disengage from the things that keep me in bondage. We all have them, they are different for each of us. It is a daily ongoing process. Some days I do okay, some days I fail miserably. God loves me and us the same on both days.
Blessings!
8.10.2009
Playing with texture
Playing around
with modeling paste
and texture tools.
which direction does it look best??
8.04.2009
Wee little me
Oh my gosh!! My sweet sister Bevie over at "He Lives" just posted a picture of me when I was a wee little thing. Hair cut looks kind of the same, minus the grey!! lol I know some of you already know my dear lovely sister. Pop on over and say hi, and take a look see!!
8.03.2009
I can't
I hate rules!! I don't like to be told what to do!! And frankly if I am honest with myself, which I am trying to do a lot lately, I want to do what I want to do when I want to do it!!! Yes, I am 53!!!
Now, as much as what I just said is true, I have a deeper desire. And that is to become the person God desires me to become. To accomplish what God has planned for me to do.
A lot of my life, and I am sure there are some of you that have believed that if I just "follow the rules", if I don't do these things, and I do these things I will be okay. This is not Christianity.
We cannot follow the rules that have been set for us perfectly, it's just not possible. But you know what is so amazing about God? He knew that - he knows that. He does not leave us to do this life on our own.
As Martha says in her very wonderful truthful book (see my previous post) we are to run for the prize. God likens our life journey as running a race. Yesterday, my pastor spoke on finishing our lives well. That at the end it is all about the journey. God not only cheers us on, but he runs the race with us - he knows we cannot do it on our own. We cannot make it to the finish line on our own, but with God and through God we can.
"Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am." Philippians 4:13 (msg)
"My grace is enough, it's all you need.
My strength comes into its own in your weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:10 (msg)
My pastor had these closing comments:
Are we responsible for how we live? YES
Can we do it?? NO
We need to depend on Jesus not our own strength.
This is the process I am in, learning how to do this. Is it easy? No. Do I screw up? Royally!!! Am I still loved unconditionally?? Oh YES!!!
Blessings dear ones!!
Now, as much as what I just said is true, I have a deeper desire. And that is to become the person God desires me to become. To accomplish what God has planned for me to do.
A lot of my life, and I am sure there are some of you that have believed that if I just "follow the rules", if I don't do these things, and I do these things I will be okay. This is not Christianity.
We cannot follow the rules that have been set for us perfectly, it's just not possible. But you know what is so amazing about God? He knew that - he knows that. He does not leave us to do this life on our own.
As Martha says in her very wonderful truthful book (see my previous post) we are to run for the prize. God likens our life journey as running a race. Yesterday, my pastor spoke on finishing our lives well. That at the end it is all about the journey. God not only cheers us on, but he runs the race with us - he knows we cannot do it on our own. We cannot make it to the finish line on our own, but with God and through God we can.
"Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am." Philippians 4:13 (msg)
"My grace is enough, it's all you need.
My strength comes into its own in your weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:10 (msg)
My pastor had these closing comments:
Are we responsible for how we live? YES
Can we do it?? NO
We need to depend on Jesus not our own strength.
This is the process I am in, learning how to do this. Is it easy? No. Do I screw up? Royally!!! Am I still loved unconditionally?? Oh YES!!!
Blessings dear ones!!
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